Why We Do What We Do

At what age would you think we are able to make sound decisions for ourselves. I mean by the time we reach adulthood we should know right from wrong, what is good or bad. So why is it that we so often do things we know are wrong. That little voice in our heads seems to win the fight time and time again. We find every excuse to do what we want instead of what is right.  You know what I am talking about, the feeling in the pit of your stomach that is trying to tell us to stop, don’t do it, but your brain says sure it’s okay, seems reasonable to me, I see no reason not to. Why…because I want it, or its easy and that feeling in my stomach was probably just gas anyway.

When I discuss this with my friends, they tell me they are guilty of the same thing.  Do we have an epidemic here? No one is immune, men and women of all ages. To be clear, I am not talking about anyone certain decision. This goes for financial, relationships, employment, verbal, spiritual issues, and the list goes on and on.  I can recall things I had given myself permission to do or say when I knew it wasn’t right, but I still did it. I often wonder if it’s because doing the wrong thing is more comfortable than doing the right thing. Maybe it’s the thrill of getting caught? Perhaps I was too scared to fix the problem. Maybe I didn’t like any of the other options. It just seemed better to go with the one that made me feel good at the time. Whatever the reason, one thing is for sure, I am not alone. At least I had that going for me.

I believe I am a reasonably smart woman, but in that moment of making a critical decision, I am starting to realize a lot has to do with how I am feeling about myself. If I am in a negative place emotionally or mentally, then I tend to do things that make me feel good regardless of the consequences. This may not be the ideal thing to do, but it’s what I do to survive. A defense mechanism if you will. When I am strong, feeling good and know life has a way of righting itself, then I am able to stand back, take a look at the situation, and make a more practical decision or choice of words.

I wonder if doing what we know is wrong is a just part of our life lessons and nothing more. Life lessons that we learn and don’t want to repeat again. Lesson learned…don’t repeat…move forward. Repeat again?

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