I am the queen bee of being busy! I look at projects in the eye and dare them to ruffle my feathers. I have purposely kept my calendar overscheduled most of my adult life, fearing I might not have something to do. I admit I am afraid to be bored. I will look for things to do if I have any free time. Gawd, forbid I relax, take a nap or meditate. Just shy of 30 years, my email address has been busy-mom. Even my license plate reads that. Most everyone I come across thinks it’s the best thing they have ever heard and wished they would have thought of it. I have strutted around with this moniker like it’s a jeweled crown. I have genuinely owned my title and felt damn good about it too.
There’s a satisfaction that comes with juggling multiple projects and then efficiently completing all to perfection. It’s a total high, and that feeling can be stronger than a drug. The problem with both of these highs is that they can and will take over your life if you let it. Many of us never realize how much damage we are doing to ourselves because we are taught from a very early age to stay busy at all times. Old sayings like “nothing good comes from boredom” or “idle hands are the devil’s workshop” remind us it’s better to be doing something rather than nothing. Or is it?
I am the first to admit there are two sides to every story, and I can usually find both sides’ truth. I say this because I have always believed you need to keep your children in activities and sports when they are young to keep them out of trouble. I also thought if I was in charge of or a part of their activities, I could make sure they were doing well and get to spend time with them killing two birds with one stone. I didn’t realize that I was missing out on one-on-one time with my girls. I also modeled how to be busy and rush around from here to there, which causes undue pressure. It’s a vicious cycle, and honestly, your children are less likely to handle that kind of stimulation and anxiety. The stress compounded by the need to reward yourself for being a superstar and confirm your children are superstars fuels the fire even more until one day you explode.
As humans, especially tiny humans, we need downtime. We need time to nap, play, and be bored. Boredom actually allows us time to find our creativity. Think about it this way. If you give a child several high tech toys, what happens after a few weeks? They get tired of them, and they end up in a pile in the corner. Give a child a cardboard box, and they will play with it for months. Our imagination is endless, given the chance and the space to explore. Here’s another example. If you are in a meeting and ten people are all yelling out their ideas at once, can you fully understand or concentrate on anything? These feelings can cause us to feel overwhelmed, anxious, tired, and irritable, yet we still believe this is the best way to live. We keep pushing, telling ourselves if we just do a little more, try a little harder, be a little smarter, work faster, we will get everything we ever wanted.
I have been listening to a beautiful book called “True Yoga” by Jennie Lee, and it was one of the reasons I wrote this post. I feel this book can help you achieve lasting happiness no matter what life brings. True Yoga is an inspirational guide that shows you how to overcome difficulties and create sustainable joy through the Eight Limbs of Yoga outlined in the Yoga Sutras. Whether challenged by work, health, relationships, or parenting, you’ll find tangible practices to illuminate your every day and spiritual life. Using daily techniques, self-inquiry questions, and inspiring affirmations, yoga therapist Jennie Lee presents a system that opens the path to fulfillment. Discover effective methods for maintaining positive thoughts, managing stress, improving communication, and building new success habits.
I want to live a peaceful, full life without being over-busy to the point of mental and physical stress. I need to re-train my brain and know that it is okay to be still. I am going to challenge myself to reorganize my priorities and rethink my goals. I challenge you, my fellow busy-moms, to do the same. Find out what you genuinely want out of your life. What will truly make you happy, and how can you achieve that without over-scheduling your life. Let me know if you are a busy woman who wants to change. I think we have a lot to discuss and can continue this conversation on the forum. I would love to connect.
“Happiness is not a result of getting something you don’t have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what you do have.”
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