Prepping for the big day
The big weekend is finally upon us…just four days away. As I wait anxiously at my daughter’s home for her so we can finalize some details, I think back to when she was a little girl and all I hoped this day would be. Alexis has worked fiercely for a year creating, planning and organizing to make sure her day is precisely what she wants it to be. I would love to say I have been a huge part of this process, but my first-born had a vision that she needed to complete on her own. At times, she was stressed beyond belief, but she insisted on working at her own pace and doing things her way, on her own time. As hard as it was for me to step back, not get my feelings hurt, I completely understood. I’m the same way. I knew that at some point she would ask for my advice, need my help, and I would be there for her.
Planning a wedding and pulling it off, although it is a job in itself, is easy in comparison to finding someone to spend the rest of your life. The journey to the altar is long and winding and can have many ups and downs. The key to a lasting relationship is how you deal with the issues that come up along the way. Communication is key.
Alexis and Matthew have the most fantastic relationship, one a mother only dreams of for her child. Their respect, dedication, communication, and love for one another is refreshing. They will have been together for six years on their wedding day, and they seem more in love and dedicated to each other with every passing day. I know it hasn’t always been easy for the two of them, but the struggles have made their relationship stronger.
Today, I stand in awe of my daughter and son-in-law to be because I know they take the longevity of their marriage seriously. They ask questions of other married couples and question the ones whose marriages have failed. Their goal is to learn from others’ mistakes and successes. They understand the future is never promised, and things will not be easy, but these two vibrant, inspiring millennials will beat the odds. I am sure of it.
The big day has arrived, and all the preparations are complete. The floral arrangements look amazing, we have run through the rehearsal, and everyone is in town. Now is the time for my daughter to relax, be pampered and treated like a queen for the day. The makeup artist and hairstylist have arrived. Maid of honor (my younger daughter) and bride tribe is present along with my mom and the groom’s mom. Champagne and breakfast are being passed around along with stories, giggles, and smiles from ear to ear. I stand back to take in the entire scene beaming from ear to ear. My daughter is getting married. She is radiant inside and out, and my little girl will now be a wife.
Alexis gave me the honor of delivering her gift to Matthew. As I watch him open the book she has prepared for him, I see all the love he has for her on his face. All the stress of the day’s prep he has been taking on to shield his future bride fades away. I am once again reminded of how much these two are in love with each other.
Alexis and Matt have chosen to do a “first look” and recite their vows they have written for each other in private prior to the ceremony (this was videotaped). They wanted a very personal moment for each other and although so far I have only seen a glimpse of Matt waiting to see his bride, I get tears in my eyes just thinking about this moment.
The ceremony was beautiful. As I walk upon the arm of Matthew seeing all our friends and family that have come to witness this special occasion, I felt blessed and extremely happy. Then to watch my daughter walk down the aisle on the arm of her father and we give her away was so powerful. Looking into her eyes and kissing her on the cheek, it reminded me of sending her off to her first day of school. This time she wouldn’t be coming home, this time she would be starting her own home, making her own family and someday sending her children off to school.
Now the fun begins! All the hard work is over (or is it), she is married, and now it’s time to party. The reception line is long, everyone wants to hug the bride and groom, give them well wishes, and tell them how beautiful they look, and they do. I may be a little prejudice, but these two kids could be models. There are more pictures to be taken, dances to dance, garters and bouquets to be thrown and cake to be eaten. Did I mention the best sunset of the year decided to happen this very evening?
I walked from table to table to greet the guests and thank them for sharing this magical night with our family. The kids danced and visited with as many people as they could. They were pulled from here to there for a picture or a conversation. I didn’t get one with the newlyweds. Nevertheless, my heart was full, my daughter looked amazing, and the two of them are headed to the next phase of their lives.
I for one will be there when they need me. I will not intrude but will offer advice if I think it is warranted. There will be hard times. I will remind them that they are strong and they can get through it, and to remember what they promised to each other on their wedding day.
I love you both with all of my heart. Love, Mom
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