I’m Glad I Went

If there’s one thing that I truly excel at, it’s talking myself out of things. I’m a total badass in my mind, but in all actuality, I’m lazy as hell. I want things to come to ME. I want results instantly so I don’t have to do anything! I want my cake, and I want to eat it while I’m snuggling with my cats on the couch.

Shit bores me. I have a short attention span. I think everything’s stupid. There are some things that peak my interest, but if it involves me actually doing it, well that’s a whole ‘nother story. I figure if I think about it a lot, it’s basically the same as actually doing it, so…

A few things that I’ve actually forced myself to do over the past few years have ended almost faster than they started. I crocheted for a few hours, then threw everything out. I did a paint-by-numbers thing, and I don’t think I even made it to 5. I tried really hard to force myself to keep going, but OMG NO.

Cue the badass spirit.

I was in the military. I did six years as a combat corpsman (Navy medic for Marines). I have what it takes. I’m just too lazy to search for it. Well, I was.  I signed up for a Krav Maga class! I’ve been low-key interested in it for years, but I mean, are you kidding me? Talk about going from 0-60 in no time at all! This is actually pretty typical for me, though — when I do find something, I go BIG!

I actually love it! It’s great exercise, I love martial arts, and the place I go is close to home (duh, haha). I’ve gone about 5 times, and even though it’s hard as F*%&, I’m still going. Why? I really want to. Not that that’s ever mattered before, though. My lazy supreme always shines through, and I talk myself out of shit.  

The past few classes, I’ve woken up the day of and immediately said I’M NOT GOING TONIGHT. I’ve got too much stuff to do. I’m too tired, blah blah blah. My brain is frantically trying to come up with a way to talk me out of it. I’ve been fighting back, though, and still going to classes. Literally forcing myself. But tonight, after class, I said something that I realized I’ve said after every class, “I’m really glad I went!”.  What?!  

I’ve decided that those 5 simple words, put together, are going to be my reminder, my mantra if you will.

When laziness starts creeping in, and it always does, I will keep repeating, “I’m glad I went”.

Because I am.

By Teresa M


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