I am a strong-minded person. I am the one people lean on, the one that people rely on when things get tough. I am the eldest of my family with a brother 2 ½ years younger. I have a sister 13 years my junior. I grew up with my brother but not my sister. Though I often wished we had. I craved having that sisterly bond. I am a mix of both my mom and my dad. Although I didn’t live with my dad growing up, it’s amazing how much I am like him. Being an entrepreneur, my father is many things. He is a self-starter, hardworking and dedicated to being the best father he can be. I have always tried hard to possess those same qualities in a way that would make him proud of me.
It seems I was born with this need to make things “right”. If a family member or a friend is wrestling with an issue I want to help resolve it. If someone should need a helping hand I am there. If I see someone crying I will find a way to make them stop. If troubled, I will un-trouble them. If dis-organized, organize them. People often say that you can’t fix or change someone that doesn’t want to be fixed or changed. I understand that…in theory. Still, I can’t help but feel that our paths had crossed for a reason. That their needs and my abilities were meant to coincide.
I am a woman with strong feelings. I take things to heart, possibly too much. I am not sure where this need to “heal” people, to handle things and situations comes from. Was I born with it? Is it hereditary? If so, was this need passed down from my mom or my dad? Is it a product of being the firstborn? Of being a latchkey kid? Or is it my numerology, my life path number or my astrology sign? I am a mother, daughter, and a sister that has been counted on to make things better. I may never really know the reason for this feeling. What I do know is that I am drawn to these types of people and situations. For better or worse, it is who and how I am.
I believe strongly this is my true calling in life. It can get tiring at times, frustrating at others. My intentions are often misunderstood. And sometimes the people that are drawn to me or that I am drawn to can take a lot out of me both emotionally and physically. I can invest so much of who I am in helping them I can forget to take care of myself. Self Care may be the trendy phrase these days but taking care of ourselves is nothing new. We have always known that you must take care of yourself first or you won’t be good for anyone else. Your flight attendant hit it right on the nail. When those Oxygen masks drop down from above your seat, make sure that your own mask is on first before helping your children. You are no good to anyone if you are not breathing, healthy and strong.
Wanting or needing to be the person to heal or help others is a good quality but it is not easy. If you can “heal” yourself first, then reach out to help, you can both be true to yourself and be the help they need. That is an amazing feeling, both for them and for you.