Expectations Of A Man

It’s tough being a full-grown man! The expectations of a man in today’s world are overwhelming. Today’s man is expected to be a tough guy, not show any emotion and at the same time, he is expected to be funny, intelligent, and stay in shape, especially if he’s single and dating.

First of all, being “Mr. Tough Guy” all the time is challenging! I’m not referring to the kind of guy that goes around punching people. I’m talking about not showing any reaction to the pain of getting a tattoo or breaking your arm. And, doing it sober! The focus and concentration required for this stoic mindset are immense.

One of the hardest things about being a man today is you’re “not allowed” to show ANY emotion. I want to bawl my brains out if I’m watching a movie and a child or puppy is being mistreated, but if there are other people in my vicinity, especially my girlfriend, I have to suck it up. I have to think about pizza or the USA hockey team in 1980 to keep a straight face. The movie “Marley & Me” was crazy sad at the end. But, I was strong for my date.

The other thing is that a man is expected to have a sense of humor. Suppose you look at ANY online dating profiles of ANY women these days. In that case, a “funny guy” is ALWAYS an essential criterion for “the man”. Do you realize how many hours of YouTube videos a guy has to watch of Chris Rock, Seinfeld, and Kevin Hart, to become a proficient funny guy? It’s exhausting!

A man is also expected to be “intelligent.” Not only to attract women but in general. On this point, I consider myself lucky that I was a “B+” student in high school, and after dropping out of college, back in the day, I eventually did get my college degree a few years later. So, I’m an intelligent guy. I can’t imagine what it’s like for the guys out there that don’t have a fancy college degree to impress people.

Probably the most challenging part about being a man these days is that you have to stay in shape. You’re expected to have a “six-pack” and “pecs” and a nice ass. For some of us older guys, this is crazy difficult. A gym membership, eating healthy, a weight bench in your living room, and a pull-up bar in the doorway to your bedroom are essential and expensive.

I don’t know. Maybe I’m just a complainer. Perhaps I’ve seen too many John Wayne movies. Imagine living in the Paleolithic era when men had to fight off saber-toothed tigers and woolly mammoths with rocks and spears. Expectations in 2021 are nothing compared to three million years ago. So, I guess that’s one way to look at it. I have also noticed that when I’m in a relationship with a woman for an extended period, those “expectations” become less important. So, maybe that’s the secret to beating this curse — finding the right woman. 

By Mike C


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